Keep Moving Forward…
I live in an apartment complex. The other day I heard a couple in the hallway say, “I want my girlfriend back. Well, I want my boyfriend back, but that is never going to happen, so…” I don’t know why these words struck me so forcefully at this particular moment, but I felt like this was a huge revelation to me.
We CAN NOT move backwards.
I am a little sad to admit this, but I have spent a lot of my time on this Earth wishing for life to go back to “how it used to be.” When things were good or I was in love or I had this job or that much money or whatever… it will NEVER happen! Life does not “return.” It does not “go back.” Moments are NEVER repeated!
There is a treatment that is used to address trauma and PTSD called EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing). The premise of this treatment is using lateral eye movements within an individual to create a new positive association for a certain situation that was traumatic. As weird as this might sound, this treatment works. I learned from Dr. Andrew Huberman the reason this treatment works is because lateral eye movements are associated with “moving forward.” As a person walks forward, their eyes are moving laterally to assess the situation around them. If any individual perceives a “threat”, their mind will automatically choose one of three options, “Fight, Flight, or Freeze.”
If an individual chooses to “fight”, their mind and body become hypervigilant and sense as much as possible. Their eyes are moving laterally as quickly as possible to “see” as much of the situation as possible as they move forward. In this situation, we are most aware. But this works when we are relaxed as well. If you are feeling stuck, bogged down by life, depressed, anxious, whatever it might be… go take a walk. Ride a bike. Do “something” to simply move forward. Your eyes will work to calm you. Your body will feel less tense. Your brain will feel more settled. Your heart rate will lower. Your nerves will soften. You WILL be better.
Just keep moving forward…
“Moments are never repeated.”
Yet you also never know what the future holds. A person can spend so much time worrying about and stressing over what WILL happen, as much as how things USED to be. Often when the future unfolds, it is not what you expected and all those moments worrying were essentially wasted.
I think realizing we cannot move backward OR predict the future makes it imperative to appreciate the present and just make the best decisions you can, to the best of your abilities.
I have never heard of EMDR. It’s an interesting concept. I wonder how and if lateral eye movements are distorted or affected by the amount of screens that people experience today—particularly in children who have been exposed to screens from a very young age…is this lateral movement innate or is it like adaptation, where the trait has the ability to be altered over time?
Yup! Good point! I think I should qualify this statement by saying “Keep moving forward IN THE MOMENT!” That is super important. Putting energy and effort to anything other than THIS moment is just wasted… perhaps. Hmmm… lots to think about… and discuss. 😉 And I do not know the answer to EMDR… but I would imagine it is an adaptation of all living creatures throughout this world that is needed for survival. I love the comments, Betsy. Thank you.